The (sometimes) great unknown

“It’s about a journey from innocence to experience.” That’s how Don Henley cryptically describes the meaning behind Hotel California in History of the Eagles, a stellar documentary even for non-fans.

There’s a part of that journey I’ve been thinking about a lot lately: the Fear of the Unknown (henceforth: FU). The scariest thing is the world is something that is about to happen but might not but actually could be good but also may be bad??

I moved last year and over the past few weeks this stretch of coastline got its first big swells of the year. They were nothing I haven’t seen for decades of riding waves, but something about new spots, new takeoffs, and new angles, gave me lots of FU. Fortunately, dark, tense mornings (did I really need to augment that with 16 oz. of coffee?) turned into high highs when I got some of the waves of my life. FU is a stretched rubber band waiting to be released.

My weekends tend to involve lots of hanging out with my friends and their kids. On a couple occasions recently we were eating something with hot sauce and encouraging the kids to try it. The look in their eyes is how I feel when I see a forecast like this one: FU.

I still feel FU when I kick off a new project. A new brief is a puzzle with a timer. A handcuffed Houdini being thrown into the water and having to pick the locks before running out of air. I don’t know the answer, but I know it’s there and that I can find it. But maybe this time I can’t?

There’s a right amount of FU to feel like something is worth pursuing. Too much and it’s probably a sign I don’t know what I’m doing. Too little and it looks too familiar. I’m trying to identify it when it arises in me and watch it until it turns to motivation and satisfaction.